Book cover of We Are Not Seeing it by Luisa Gray. Image shows a teacher character saying your child is not masking in school we are not seeing it, accompanied by a parent point to their child wearing a mask

The Amazon #1 best seller every SEND parent needs to read

“We Are Not Seeing It: How and Why Mainstream Schools Break SEND Kids” is a gamechanger – if you’ve ever wondered why mainstream school isn’t working for your child (whether they have diagnosed SEND or not), blogger and SEND parent Luisa Gray lifts the lid on:

  • How anyone can be a SEND parent (and not know it!)
  • Why Quality First Teaching fails pretty much every child
  • Parent blame, child blame, gaslighting – and how they are the default in schools
  • “Command and Control” discipline gone out of control
  • SEND law – and how everyone ignores it
  • How these factors created the perfect storm for SEND children in schools
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“We Are Not Seeing It: How and Why Mainstream Schools Break SEND Kids” is written from Luisa’s real life experience as a SEND parent and blogger. If you’re the parent of a school-age child in the UK, this book is packed with information you need to know – along with a few of Luisa’s self-confessed “crap sketches” ..

Cartoon sketch to compare what everyone sees, and how distressed a SEND parent really feels on the inside

Table of contents

Here’s what’s covered in “We Are Not Seeing It”

Chapters

1

Preface

2

My Kids Are Being Bullied. And So Am I

3

Anyone Can Be a SEND Parent

4

What Is School For And Why Do We Send Our Kids There?

5

19th Century Values in 21st Century Education

6

Violence = Compliance

View all Chapters

About the author

Luisa Gray

Luisa Gray (a.k.a LongRoadSENDMum) is proud parent to two fantastic kids, who also happen to have SEND (Special Educational Needs & Disabilities). 

After careering around a bit in advertising, and nearly losing her mind as a stay-at-home mum, Luisa became a parent blogger.  Parenting hadn’t turned out to quite like it looked in the glossy baby magazines (because let’s be honest, none of those glossy magazines ever talk about “What to do if it turns out your kiddo has SEND and you worked that out but nobody believes you”).

Sharing her experiences of this unexpected SEND journey with – and giving support to – other families in the same situation, was basically cheaper than therapy.  It’s also brought a lot of joy and connection with thousands of other parents in the same situation.

“The Long Road – A Diary of a SEND Mum” has been running on Facebook since 2021, organically growing a loyal following of over 10,000 SEND parents, practitioners and professionals from all over the world.  People are drawn to Luisa’s informal, warm, sometimes funny, sometimes angry, but always no-gloss and truthful approach to life as a UK SEND parent.  For some reason, people also seem to really like her hand-drawn “crap sketches”.  

Luisa lives in the North of England with LongRoadDad, Big Bruv, Little Sis and probably one too many cats.  She likes loud music, strong tea and good cake.

Image shows a parent trying to decide between 2 children, one is screaming in meltdown, the other is in silent shutdown

What readers said

★★★★★

The best book for SEND parents since “Changing Our Minds” by Naomi Fisher ~ A spot on, detailed book which perfectly and incisively lays out the state of SEND failure in the current state school sector, the exact law surrounding it, and the author’s own very highly informed manifesto for addressing the current crisis at a governmental level.
Whilst it contains a few “Long Road” cartoons, this is a thorough, serious – but very readable – book. ~ ZEBBIE – Amazon Review

★★★★★

Bloody Brilliant ~ Only read the preface and it makes my blood boil, currently going through this nightmare and fighting the system. My 6 year old EHE daughter who was ‘fine ‘ in school found the ‘piss off’ quotes amusing it opened a lovely conversation up about how awful her year 1 teacher was and how she did nothing to help her. I’m going to send a copy to the school for their library 🤣
Keep fighting everyone and don’t let them silence you, even when they refer you to ‘safeguarding’ in a last ditch attempt to silence and get rid off of you ~ Julie – Amazon Review

★★★★★

A must read book for parents of SEND kids. ~ I bought this book through a recommendation on a SEND forum. I am totally blown away that the problems/bulling I’ve been experiencing for the last 6 years are so widespread, real and not just in my head. A clearly written, easy to read (I’m dyslexic) book which has given me renewed oomph to keep on fighting for my kids. Thank you to the author for a truly honest and eye opening book. ~ Amazon Review

The About’s Words